I had a boyfriend from 1990 to 1995 that I used to call Dearie. I didn’t realize how abusive it was until just before we broke up, when a good friend kept pointing out that I shouldn’t tolerate Dearie’s behavior. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
I recently found my journal from the last year or so of that relationship. Here’s an example of a Relationship Red Flag <\/p>\n\n\n\n
January 13, 1994<\/p>
I’m confused! I’m not too sure if I wanted to have sex with Dearie today. I mean it was nice and everything, but I don’t know whether or not I really wanted to. I feel bad about that & I hope Dearie doesn’t think he pressured me into anything. I wasn’t planning on having sex today. I guess that’s why I feel this way.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n
If you’ve ever felt this way about your partner, it’s a huge fucking red flag and you either should bring it up with the person or ditch the manipulative asshole already. Obviously I know this is easier said than done, but trust me, you should never have to be talked into having sex. No matter who you are.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I had a boyfriend from 1990 to 1995 that I used to call Dearie. I didn’t realize how abusive it was until just before we broke up, when a good friend kept pointing out that I shouldn’t tolerate Dearie’s behavior. I recently found my journal from the last year or so of that relationship. Here’s… Continue reading Relationship Red Flag Journal Entry #1<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2,4],"tags":[25,27,24,26],"class_list":["post-276","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-daphne","category-journal","tag-coercive-sex-isnt-ok","tag-denying-abuse","tag-emotional-abuse","tag-relationship-red-flag"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p8fVx5-4s","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":334,"url":"https:\/\/minimoog.net\/daphne\/surviving-amour-fou-5-the-may-december-thing\/","url_meta":{"origin":276,"position":0},"title":"Surviving Amour Fou #5: The May\/December Thing","author":"Daphne Lightner","date":"January 23, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"I just finished reading Priscilla Presley's book about her time with Elvis. 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