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Hi, I'm Lightnerd, a late Gen-X SoCal Native.

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Category: daphne

daphne · journal

Year Six

August 1, 2020January 27, 2021 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

I’ve had a new apartment with Sweetie for three weeks. I’m still trying to get used to it. Sweetie got a job in June while I was on vacation with him and Darling. It was a great opportunity, so off he went. That signaled that it was finally time to look for a place. (It… Continue reading Year Six

daphne · journal

Hey, it’s August!

August 1, 2020June 27, 2023 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

Darling is here for a few days. It feels so much more like home when he’s here. After all, that’s why we got a 2 bedroom. 🙂 The three of us will need the room. Plus the stepcats need a place away from the rest of the house because Sweetie’s allergic. (Yep, Cat Room #2!)… Continue reading Hey, it’s August!

daphne · journal

Three of A Perfect Pair

June 28, 2020June 27, 2023 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

This Pride Month, I’m coming out as Polyamorous. I am currently in a triad relationship with two awesome men. Sweetie, who I’ve been with for the better part of 5 years, and Darling, who I’ve been with for about 6 months. (They’ve been seeing each other a year or so.) This means that the we’re… Continue reading Three of A Perfect Pair

daphne

Black Hole Sun: The Song That Changed My Life

June 26, 2020June 27, 2023 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

Picture it, 1994: Southern California I hear this song on the radio, and I saw the video. Immediately loved it. It was soothing at a rough time in my life. 1994 was not an easy year for a whole number of reasons. This song was like a drug–it would take me away from my problems… Continue reading Black Hole Sun: The Song That Changed My Life

daphne · journal

Surviving Amor Fou, #2: Music

June 2, 2020June 27, 2023 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

I’m sitting here listening to The Beatles album Let It Be. Much like Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of The Moon, The Beach Boys’ Pet Sounds, and Suzanne Vega’s 9 Objects of Desire, this album reminds me so much of Kevin that I’ve actively refrained from listening to it until now. I don’t know what changed… Continue reading Surviving Amor Fou, #2: Music

daphne · journal

Relationship Red Flag Journal Entry #1

June 2, 2020June 2, 2020 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

I had a boyfriend from 1990 to 1995 that I used to call Dearie. I didn’t realize how abusive it was until just before we broke up, when a good friend kept pointing out that I shouldn’t tolerate Dearie’s behavior. I recently found my journal from the last year or so of that relationship. Here’s… Continue reading Relationship Red Flag Journal Entry #1

daphne · journal

Surviving Amor Fou, #1: Panic Attacks

May 26, 2020May 27, 2020 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

a·mour fou/ˌämo͝or ˈfo͞o/noun uncontrollable or obsessive passion. I was first introduced to this concept when watching The Sopranos with Kevin. Tony Soprano fell in love with one of Dr. Melfi’s other patients and had quite a tumultuous time of it. I kind of had a feeling at the time I watched those episodes that my… Continue reading Surviving Amor Fou, #1: Panic Attacks

daphne · journal

Another 20 Year Milestone

April 27, 2020June 27, 2023 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

On April 26, 2000, I got my tubes tied. I had to fight like hell to get it. Everyone saw this unmarried 20-something of Mexican descent in LA County who did not want to have children. They laughed at me. They tried to get me to get a psychiatric evaluation. They kept telling me I… Continue reading Another 20 Year Milestone

daphne · journal

It was 20 Years Ago Today. . .

April 6, 2020June 27, 2023 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

No Sgt. Pepper here. 😉 20 years ago today, April 6,2000, I stood on a cliff in West Maui and married Kevin. I still smile when I think of that day. Giggling as we held hands and walked behind the minister on the way to that spot. People noticing us and cheering because we were… Continue reading It was 20 Years Ago Today. . .

daphne · journal

Narrative Mostly Freewriting #5

March 11, 2020March 12, 2020 Daphne LightnerLeave a comment

The Miles David album “Bitches Brew” is about to turn 50, and I’m listening to it for the first time. I recognize a lot of the names of the people who are playing with him. I’m 3 minutes into “Pharaoh’s Dance” and I’m in love already. Exactly the kind of jazz I tend to lean… Continue reading Narrative Mostly Freewriting #5

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